What of kin?

Human though I not be, this Sir Gawain’s rage and sorrow I know too well. Honor and title mean nothing with dead kin, and more loss than I piled high. Three to my one, and even human so little pity for the killer be thought of so highly. Only solace in revenge and death. This too be called evil even though Gawain human. For why I do not see, the rage that makes sense. Though this too wanes with death. Revenge unrealized for Gawain too, but anger he stops. Upon death, that rage dies too, but still Launcelot lives.

What more he asks for his presence with death after claiming it be one or the other. You wish blood, but then company at death from the one you wanted to kill. What anger and where? Even in death, I felt that rage that sorrow. Vengeance taken from me so it have taken from you, but still peace you find. His death later realized, but no knowing of this as you die. For what reason this peace?

I understand not, for even when Beowulf killed, not by my hand, but dead, I still feel rage. I never achieved vengeance and only solace is that he be killed by another. Does human kin or knight kin equal family? Other of your kin still live so though loss higher that solitude you not feel. Did that make it easier to bear? Toward death, that anger leave for what reason I still do not know.

Loyalty, to ones Lord or to ones Lady?

Friends, I come to you now with a heavy heart. I Launcelot du Luc have oft been named as the truest of Knights and have taken great pains to be worthy of being so named. What would one ask of a true knight?

Strength of arms? Mine exploits are well known. I have been victorious in battles of many knights against one. I told you before of my victory over Sir Phelot weilding a humble rownsepyk and armed in naught, but my breeches. At Castle Tantagil, I slew two giants who had help the people captive for seven years.

Chastity? Knowing now near the whole of my life, you may make jest at this, but was ever a knight more sorely tempted? When I was taken in my sleep, by enchantment by Morgane la Fey and her three sisters I refused them.

thee behoveth now to choose one of us four. I am the Queen Morgan le Fay, queen of the land of Gore, and here is the queen of Northgalis, and the queen of Eastland, and the queen of the Out Isles; now choose one of us which thou wilt have to thy paramour, for thou mayest not choose or else in this prison to die. This is an hard case, said Sir Launcelot, that either I must die or else choose one of you, yet had I liefer to die in this prison with worship, than to have one of you to my paramour maugre my head. And therefore ye be answered, I will none of you, for ye be false enchantresses”

Loyalty? . . . Some would call me traitor, for it is true that I lay with Guinevere who was queen to Arthur. It was  wicked trap I was caught in, more dangerous than any enemy human, fey, or monster. I was not torn between Loyalty and lustful treachery, but between two loyalties. Always I had been loyal to both King Arthur and to Queen Guinevere. When I offered mercy to defeated knights, I bade them to lay themselves at the judgement of King Arthur and then to offer service to Queen Guinevere. During the golden age of Camelot these two loyalties were as one. When it was demanded that I betray one to be true to the other, was I made to choose betwixt loyalty and loyalty or treachery and treachery? As a knight I have never called myself a judge, having always left that to my Lord and Lady. I will leave you with a single testimony that is was not I who began the dance of the three of us for Merlin gave warning to Arthur before he sought the hand of fair Guinevere and it was well know that Merlin’s warning are often prophecy.

“Merlin warned the king covertly that Guenever was not wholesome for him to take to wife, for he warned him that Launcelot should love her, and she him again”





The Wrongfully Covetous Shall Always Succumb to the Rightful Leader

Alas how this tale of the noble King Arthur’s ascension to the throne reminds me of mine to Emperor of Rome. In Arthur’s case the covetous men who aspired to the throne denied him of his rightful title even after multiple instances of irrefutable proof, each time delaying his crowning until the next holiday. And for what? Did they honestly believe they would be capable of removing Excalibur, especially if they failed the first time or the next time after that? I too was destined by divine power to become the ruler, although of an empire, one many times greater in size than Arthur’s realm–not that this matters though. However, the opposition that I faced was different in nature. Of course, Rome being a larger kingdom–not that this matters again–I faced far more coveters. Galba was the first to unrighteously claim the title as emperor, subsequent to Nero’s suicide. He was soon murdered by the supporters of the next wrongful coveter Otho, who in turn was soon defeated by the last primary wrongful coveter, Vitellius, who was the most difficult to get rid off. By this time I had left Jerusalem, my son Titus assuming the task of putting those rebels in Jerusalem back in line, and headed for Alexandria in order to secure the grain supplies, while the rest of my army headed to Rome under the command of M. Antonius Primus. It was a bloody matter overcoming Vitellius as well as the other wrongful coveters, but in the end nothing could prevent my divinely ordained destiny, as was the case with Arthur, albeit there was supposedly no violence in his ascension, which makes sense since in my case it was for Rome, a much larger kingdom–again not that this matters at all.

Arthur’s Rise

‘Tis a great tale, Arthur’s rise to the throne. My great powers of deception allowed this renowned and powerful king to come into existence. I do not hold any regret over our deception, the death of the Duke of Tintagel was an inevitability. For Lady Igraine to bear the fated King Arthur, he was a necessary and unfortunate casualty. It also did not help his cause that he had created an enemy of King Uther Pendragon. His wife, Lady Igraine appeared to hold no ill will against us. She also seemed rather relaxed that King Uther Pendragon had slept with her during our elaborate ruse. It is also quite odd that Lady Igraine was so carefree about young Arthur being delivered to me. Fate would have it be regardless, however.

Arthur’s rise to king was destined to be at the hands of his mythical sword. His noble blood had been kept secret in order to craft him into the celebrated king that he will forever be known as. His humble reaction to being deemed king displayed the necessity in his childhood outside of the nobility. As I had predicted, fate would have Arthur unite all of England and Scotland. His reign as king would forever be remembered and tales would be told of his noble kingdom.

The Moral of My Tale

Hearken, all ye listeners, to my tale, the story of Everyman and his harrowing journey. I hope, ye listeners, that thou recognizeth a great moral within my tale. I have mentioned thus before, in numerous of thy discussions, that to face Death and the judgment of Our Lord is a prospect most dire and terrifying. Thou knoweth now of how I quailed in the face of my judgment, and of the many I turned to for council and comfort. None would commit themselves to travel with me beyond the mortal coil, to face the critical eye of Our Lord as He judgeth our sins and our lives. Twas only the Good Deeds of my life, frail as they were, that would commit to my journey and stand beside me before the eye of God. Tis a lucky and painful truth that, in life, I was unconcerned with these Deeds, and strengthened them not through admirable pursuit. Only once I had received the benefit of a Confession didst my deeds stand strong enough to earn me a place in Our Lord’s great Kingdom. I could admit the great relief twas brought to me by my salvation, but such a fact, I hope, is obvious. Instead, I turn thy attention to the true moral of my tale. Tis one of shame, shame at recognizing my shortcomings only when faced with Death and divine judgment. I would then use my tale as a careful warning to thee, my listeners. Long have I preached that such trifles as Goods and Strength and Beauty are impermanent things, sources of shameful Pride that will comfort one in life and abandon them just the same when Death arrives. Twas luck allowed me salvation when I Confessed to wash myself of sin. The lesson is that a life spent Confessing as thou shouldst, and living with care for the strength of thy Good Deeds, is what guarantees salvation. Hindsight shouldst never be thy moral compass. Now I send to thee my blessing, and wish you all purity and light in thy lives and in the eye of Our Lord.

Greetings to my Fellow Saints

Blessed be our Lord Jesus Christ and the salvation He has given to His creature. I greet you in the name of our Lord and the Holy Trinity. I thank God for the many mercies He has shown me and for His pleasure, I desire to spend the rest of my days worshipping and glorifying His kindness and goodness towards me. Many people mock and ridicule my constant tears but if they only knew the immoral sin He saved this aforesaid creature from and the damnation of my soul, they would cry even more than I. Furthermore, I pray for God to have mercy on the bishops and clerks and the men of God that speak against this creature as being a heretic and a person against the Holy Church when it is this institution that taught me the love of Christ. Blessed be God for this great tribulation. I take comfort in the hardships that greet me on every side, knowing that I suffer for Christ’s sake. I give honor to my devoted husband , John. Many thanks be to God for helping him to see his sexual desire as sin in the eyes of the Lord, and made him to live a chaste life.

I greet you in the name of the Lord. Amen.

John Kempe to My Wife Margery Kempe

When I first noticed your sickness, I was scared. I was not scared for myself as I had no reason to be. I loved the Lord and my land. I did well by marrying the daughter of man that once held position of mayor. I followed the commandments set forth by the Bible, for the most part. You on the other hand, you creature that I call wife, Margery Kempe, were blasphemous and recalcitrant in all ways that a woman could be. I stood aside and watched as you destroyed your holy self and betrayed the commandments of Jesus Christ the son. Alas, there were so many sins for which Jesus the son may have found fit to punish you for.

Perhaps it was your first and greatest sin you write about and yet tell very little of. While I am your husband and a faithful servant of God, I don’t not expect you to reveal such trifles to me for that is not my place to hear sin and absolve. Nay, that is a job of a Priest. I read you invited one only to remain silent about this mysterious sin of yours. Perhaps that could’ve upset our Lord Jesus the son. That you would so desecrate a servant of the Lord by inviting him to hear your sins only to make waist of his time and keep your transgressions to yourself.  Unfortunately, your sins did not stop there. I recall your time of slander. When you began slandering me, your very husband, with accusations mendacious in nature.  Or when you had been once forgiven by the Lord and continued to live a life of pomp and circumstance, presenting your earthly riches for all the world to know and to inspire jealousy of our neighbors and family and friends. Perhaps it was the way you addressed me, your earthly lord and husband, when I merely suggested that you release yourself from all earthly desires and restrain your sinful urges to display your wealth. In defiance and with much haughtiness, you chided me, saying I could’ve never hoped to marry such a woman of your station.  Perhaps it was your failed attempts at opening businesses, work not made for women of course, in order to support your lavish and excessive desires.

Aye, your list of betrayals to Jesus Christ the son are endless. It is true that I made feast out of your body though you asked me not to. Yet, that I believe is my only sin. Besides that, I have been a model of a Christian man. This is why I believe the Lord gave me the power to decide whether or not you would be chaste when you went to him. Because I was such a loyal follower, I was given agency to determine whether or not you would ever know another man carnally. Though you’ve been less than a perfect wife and an astonishingly displeasing Christian, I decided to give you mercy as our savior Jesus the son has given us so many times throughout our lives. I let you devote your body to God as you once devoted it to me and allowed you to head to Jerusalem. For that, I’m sure you are grateful.